The Necessary Occurrence

July 31, 2019

For the month of August, I've taken a step back from everything. Friends. Family. Social Media. My need to love and be compassionate with EVERYTHING and EVERYONE.  I don't know why it takes pain to open up my mind and my fingers to write again.  Since writing my book, I've been on a mental shut down.  I've been doing everything except the right thing.

Trust has been a huge theme as of late.  With my promise to myself, I promised to be more honest, open and dare I fucking say it... VULNERABLE. I have managed to step into this and be these things for myself and others.  I've managed to step into it, no matter the discomfort level and open myself up the possibility of being hurt, but trusting that it wouldn't happen. So far, it hasn't worked in my favor. Although painful it is very necessary to still try to trust love others, knowing that they will fucking disappoint you. Only the true few, will take the same oath and stand in the paint.. no matter how much it hurts.  Those are the relationships to keep, cherish and water.

I need a break. A true, mental break.

Dear God,
If you're listening.. send help.



UPDATE: August 16, 2019 

Silence.

Complete and utter silence was sent my way like a whirlwind.  The dire need for silence -- space.  Granted once I asked for help.  Most people think their thoughts and words aren't being heard but there is a higher being vibrating words and actions.  Suddenly, my cell stops ringing as much.  My job, slows and they offer time off.  Friends and family take the time to handle it all on their own. Life, slows and begins to make sense. I have taken a small hiatus from social media to hone in on the things that I need and want out of life. I get a little closer, everyday. I will continue this journey and update as I go.  My spirit is happy.

Ase' - Namaste' - Peace